January 31 is fast approaching. Better get ready. And this is what you do: Clean your house. Sweep dirt, dust, or snow, away from your door. Get this done before the
stroke of midnight, January 30, at which time you fling open your doors and windows to welcome the New Year. Chinese New Year, that is. Henceforth, no sweeping for five days, no foul language, evil thoughts or reference to the past year. Bad luck! Light demon-chasing firecrackers, eat, drink, dance with the dragon. You're on a two-week roll. (Would that be spring or egg? Auuuuuugh!) Expect little bits
of money in little red envelopes (no, they are not valentines). Woo- whoo! It's the Year of the Horse!
Dined at a Chinese restaurant? Then you probably
know about the Chinese zodiak and its twelve animals. If I had my druthers, my animal would be the Horse. I love horses. Unfortunately, it is the Pig.
Besides the fact that my mom hated them, pigs are just not that appealing. A brief discription of Pig says: Not as smart as Dog, lazy, likes eating and sleeping, grows fat, kind to loved ones. Do not tell lies unless they have to.
See what I mean?
Still the old wallow holds some pretty interesting folks. For instance, Henry VIII, Arnold Schwartznegger, Woody Allen. (These guys
rate an Ugh!) But we also find Stephen King and Ernest Hemingway. Lucille Ball was a Pig, funny and smarter that most Dogs. Carrie Underwood sings better than the Dogs I know.
But the name that makes me proudest to be a Pig is Hilary Rodham Clinton. We all know she's smarter than the dog she married. Think of it, our next President might be a Pig!
Oh, oh, if Pox Network gets hold of this..........